Suzanna.

Sticks don’t usually have lives. But some do.

Smoo and Smaa.

That’s what they called themselves. And they had the ability to call themselves that because they were alive. Like how you wake up one day (when you’re around 5 years old) and say, “Hey, I want to choose my own name, I don’t like this one.”

So Smoo and Smaa called themselves that. They decided to share a common second name. Not that they were married or anything, but because they’d been together from the time they could remember.

Smoo Da and Smaa Da.

Da was the first sound they heard. It was the sound they heard when the tree they were on popped out Smoo and Smaa.
Da.
Da.
Ta-dah!

And where did they get their amazing powers from? The tree of course, the Da of all trees. A powerful one, worshipped by the wise sages of the Himalayas, and renowned the world over for its magical properties. Magical properties so magical that I dare not mention it here for fear of invoking the rage of other magical creatures.

Out of the two, Smaa Da was the smarter one. One day he just pronounced himself smart, “I’m Smaa Da therefore I’m smarter.” Smoo Da said okay to it, like all smart people do.

One day while the two were sitting on a ledge watching the sunset, Smoo Da sighed and said, “I love sunsets”. Smaa Da jumped up, turned around, took Smoo Da by her skinny shoulders and kissed her passionately. Smoo Da was gobsmacked. I mean, she had a crush on him all along, and now after 1134 years, he kisses her. Just when she thought she was getting over him that too.
“I love sunsets too,” said Smaa Da and kissed her again, “we have soo much in common, I think we should get together.”

“Like du-uh,” thought Smoo Da, “we’ve been together so long and we’re the only Da sticks we know, like we have no choice other than to get together.”
“Errr, ok, let’s,” replied Smoo Da and put a skinny arm around a skinny hip.

In 9 days, there were li’l Da sticks running all around the place. Smoo Da and Smaa Da went quite mad picking names. Commere. Gothere. Nothere. Whatshere. Lotshere. Gonethere. Etc etc.

And so it was that the Da clan multiplied and grew in numbers enough to cover the world. Many times round. And because of their magical properties they were much loved. The beautiful thing about Da sticks is that they never tell anyone (outside the Da clan) about their magical abilities. So it looks like the person who has a Da stick is a magician.

So the next time you see someone using chopsticks here, you know who’s responsible.




(Poster entitled 'Da looks good' placed at Xian, the Chinese restaurant/ takeaway)